External Validation vs. Internal Validation: Choosing the Voice That Matters

When I was working a 9–5, I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought following the “stable” path would eventually lead me to security, recognition, and maybe even fulfillment. But truthfully? I didn’t care so much about the promotions or recognition. What weighed on me more was not wanting to disappoint people. I wanted to fit in, to be seen as someone who was doing things “the right way.”

But here’s the part I never expected: no matter how much I tried to meet those expectations, I kept running into roadblocks. I couldn’t climb the corporate ladder the way I thought I should. I found myself having to prove myself over and over again. And even when I gave my all, I still ended up being laid off or having to leave toxic workplaces.

That cycle taught me something important: living for external validation doesn’t guarantee stability, success, or peace of mind. It just keeps you chasing after approval that may never come.

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The Truth About Playing It Safe

I think a lot of us are seeking external validation, waiting for approval before we make a move, before we take a risk, before we fully show up for ourselves. And for a long time, I lived that way too. I was living in my backup plan, not because I doubted my ability, but because I thought it was safer. I thought if I stayed in a space that everyone else agreed with, I couldn’t get it wrong.

But playing it safe doesn’t protect you the way you think it does. It just keeps you stuck, and the truth is, stuck is its own kind of failure.

At some point, you realize life isn’t asking you to be safe, it’s asking you to be real. It’s asking you to listen to the passions that won’t quiet down, the dreams that keep resurfacing no matter how many times you push them away. Those desires aren’t random, they’re signals pointing you toward the life you’re meant to build.

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Why Internal Validation Lasts

And yes, it’s uncomfortable. Yes, people may not always understand. But external approval isn’t what will make you feel proud at the end of the day. Living in alignment with who you are, and creating a life that reflects your full potential, is the only validation that lasts.

As a content creator, I’ve had to learn this lesson over and over. It’s easy to get caught up in likes, numbers, or other people’s opinions. But when I ground my worth in internal validation — rooted in faith, purpose, and truth — I can keep showing up even when no one else applauds.

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Choosing Yourself Over Approval

At the end of the day, I’ve had to ask myself: do I want to live for people’s expectations, or do I want to live in alignment with God’s calling? Internal validation may be quieter, but it’s lasting. And that’s the voice that matters most.

So the question is—are you still playing it safe, or are you ready to finally choose yourself?